I’m letting it sink in that no matter how good, kind or considerate you try to be, some people will not choose to be your friend. And the better realization that follows is that while I have my flaws, it really is their loss. Yay for growing up.
Also, while I realize that being thin will not make me happy, it will make me happier than being fat. Throwing up will take away the hopes and dreams I hold on to (plus my teeth). Starving will at least provide me with the control I need. Especially since I have no control over how other people feel about me. I hate men.
Let the restriction begin. (Except for Thursday of course, where I will make good choices.)