Just not good enough. Just too fat. Being fat cancels out like everything else that's good about me. And if it weren't for that I think I would like myself a lot, most of the time. I feel so inadequate. So out of control. Never enough time. Always too much food. Never enough running. Never good enough. Never quite meeting the standard.
I get depressed when I think this way. But I just can't... I know I can be everything I wanna be... I just have to find it in myself. Doesn't help that I'm sleeping weird hours and on my period. I'm starting to get anxious about going back to work :(