I hope this doesn't trigger you... I ate crap. But it turned out ok.

Yesterday I binged. It was almost inevitable, positive thoughts or not. I ate hibachi with my friend on the spur of the moment. And then I had screwed it all up so I went to steak and shake with my friend and had a turkey club, fries, and split a turtle shake with her.

Today i had some M&ms, some hot chocolate, tons of coffee, and a bowl of potato soup that my roommate made from scratch. It can't possibly have been good for my heart/arteries. I could see the butter floating around in it. But i was so weak and terribly hungry. Grr.

And now for the good news. I went for a run after that, even though I was terribly tired. I just told myself I would walk and only run if I felt up to it. And I did! I ran and ran and ran. I usually do an hour. Today I did an hour and a half. I just couldn't stop. I enjoyed myself so so much. I must have burned at least as many cals running as were in that bowl of soup. Had to. Stupid soup couldn't have had 700 cals!

I came home and weighed myself just to see how much water I lose when I work out like that. I know I have been saying I'm gonna stay away from the scale... Well, it said 168.8!!!!! I have been stuck like a magnet to 170! I know its probably a little bit of a fluke and I will be back up as soon as I drink water, but it gave me hope that maybe I've just been bloated this entire time or something dumb like that. At least that maybe its not fat...? I'm preparing to see a high number again tomorrow, but for the moment, I am elated.

I wish I didn't have to drink water, but I have a voice lesson tomorrow and hydration is terribly important for a healthy voice.

I love you skinnies! I dunno how I lucked out like this, but I'm happy for the moment!