I wish I could have a scale. I wish I could go home and not have what I eat be watched. I hate Christmas. I think I did well, but I just don't want people to be around me and notice what I eat, little or a lot.

Today I got 2 cute pairs of shoes and a great red purse. Merry Christmas. I can see a small difference in my body now, which is good. I took some diet pills before dinner, but I have a lot of anxiety about whether they will/did work. I know that hunger is the best way. Pretty much the only way for me, actually.

Ugggggghhhhhh... I need a scale!!! I have another 8 days here, and I can't believe I have to wait that long before I can really launch into real weight loss. I told my Dad I had lost 10 lbs. since graduation, and that's possible... but I dunno if its quite true.

What's sad about this whole thing is that I love Jesus and people, but I don't have time to be focused on them if I am only focused on my weight. When I hit 100 lbs, I can care about other people more effectively again...