Today I ate 2 egg whites, a piece of ham, had some coffee with 4 oz of 2 percent milk, about a teaspoon of cranberries, and then a lettuce/tomato/onion salad with two and a half tbsp of A-1 as the dressing (that part was yummy).

Approximately 300 cals, my most recent low.

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Actually, even if I count the calories from the fresh veggies, its like 219 :D

Happy about this. Pretty much I'm going to start using A-1 as my dressing bc its low cal and yummy. Also, dried cranberries, if you feel like you will pass out and you just eat a few, will hold you over. For 1/3 cup its like 130 cals, but I had about a teaspoon worth and it was only 7 cals! It definitely held me over so I wouldn't get sick!

I didn't work out today because i slept right through my alarm. Suck. But my eating was the best it has been, and I got away with it! I think I am going to try the salad trick again tomorrow and see if I can get away with it. Yesss!

I am really happy about how I did today, but I am pretty pissed about how fat I still am. I have this raging fear in my head that I won't have lost weight, or I will have lost a ridiculously little amount while here. Seriously, if I lost less than 10, something is seriously wrong with me and I might be fat forever. I am working soooooo so hard. I hope that's not the case... I would kill to be in the 160's by Colorado. Then I wouldn't be so putrid and they might take me somewhat seriously... I have pictures of me around that weight, and in most pics, I can sort of stand the sight of myself... kinda.

It really hit me today, again, how disgusting I am. We have been shopping a couple of times this week, and it really really really is pointless to try to buy clothes or even to look cute in what you have unless you are thin. I look horrible in everything no matter how hard I try. I am pretty sure i will not start wearing makeup again until I can look decent in my clothes. Seriously.