It seems life is crazy for all of us... It is the end of April after all. April and May are by nature just a very busy time of year with exams, school programs, field trips, picnics, etc etc etc. I notice a lot of you aren't posting/commenting or apologizing constantly and profusely for not doing these things much. I guess I must do the same, because I've been sucking.

I just can't stop eating.


Its like the floodgates opened. I'm working on regaining control of my mind though. Part of it is that my roommate has a lot of junk in the house right now because one of her friends had a bday party that she threw.

Nothing matters but being skinny. I've gained. I will keep gaining if I dont put a stop to this. Nothing matters but being skinny. NOTHING. Because everything else is attached to it. I will continue to be a fatass forever if I don't fix this. I saw some embarrassing pictures of myself from this week when I accepted my award. Gross.

I HAVE TO LOSE WEIGHT. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels. And I want to be thin. So there's no option but to Control.